Dear McDonald’s, Taco Bell, and Burger King; french fries and chocolate shakes; chicken fingers and fries with ranch; Lime Tostitos and Oreos; tortilla chips with a block of cream cheese and salsa, entire bags of popcorn, and small bags of Fritos; Dunkin Donuts, Dairy Queen, and Starbucks desserts; three times too big portions at dinner, double helpings or rice, potatoes, and bread; Diet Coke; coffee ‘lite and sweet’; brownies, full fat ice cream, and Samoas; Mexican, pizza, and big bowls of white pasta; and- well, all the other crap I ate on a regular basis:

I know we were friends. I know you made me feel better when I was sad, angry, lonely, bored, and tired. I think I made you feel better because I wanted you so, and often made that clear. I loved having the option of turning to you whenever I wanted- it made me feel comforted and happy. Calmer. I knew you would always be there for me, just waiting. You would always taste the way I wanted you to. You would always reward me with equal parts of sweet satisfaction and guilt. You knew how I liked you and were always that way- fattening, greasy, and bad for me.

You are like my bad boy. The one thing I just can’t walk away from, even though I knew how bad you all were for me. You could give me diabetes, heart disease, and make it harder for me to get pregnant. Yet I come back to you time and time again. You make my tummy hurt after I eat you, yet I let you abuse me some more the next time. I knew how bad you were for me, people told me how bad you were for me, and yet I couldn’t walk away.

I can’t lie- I may come and visit, but I can’t stay anymore. When I do come visit- things won’t be the same. I won’t be going all the way with you- I won’t be filling myself until I can’t eat anymore, I won’t keep coming back. I have to walk away now. All the consequences of loving you are becoming too hard. I’m tired all the time. I hate the way my body feels and looks. None of my cute clothes fit. I feel like I’m dragging all the time. You’re just not worth it anymore.

I know this is going to be a hard break-up. I already miss you. You sit there taunting me, all M&M like and looking all cute in pink and orange when I drive by you just craving a hot chocolate. Yet… it’s time for me to walk away. To learn to love the good guys, who will love me back and make me feel better about myself and healthy. I must leave you though.

It was a good time, but the effects suck. Good luck with all your other lovers, I know there are many.

~Paige